It's On My Mind...

I feel so full of something today. I am just going to come right out say it:

I am really just wondering who the hell sending their gold jewelry in those dumb little envelopes to those scam artists on T.V. saying they'll melt it and send real do re mi in return?

Let me just see if I have this right. You take a big ol' handful of all that old gold you have laying around your house (real gold, the kind that is a precious metal) stuff it in the self addressed envelope that they (the, in my opinion, thieving, conniving bastards on the TV) send you and mail it off with some hope and magic that someone somewhere will 1. actually receive it. B) not pretend like they didn't receive it 3. tell you legitimately what it melted down to usable gold bars d) tell you legitimately what that weight in gold is really worth and finally 5. send you an actual, legitimate, honest to goodness cashable check. Well, frick! what an awesome idea! Absolutely nothing could possibly ever go wrong with this! Hand me that damn envelope!

This is just in case you don't believe me because you are much too busy to watch television or some other reason you're probably fibbing about too